Whole Foods Challenge - Day 2

So far, so good.

And by good, I mean really, really yummy!!

Last night, we had roast beef with gravy, roasted potatoes, and corn on the cob. It was SO good!! And it was all homemade, made from scratch!

Today, I started out with a homemade granola bar (although it has dried apples, cranberries, and semi-sweet chocolate in it, so not ENTIRELY perfect, but I believe it's in the spirit of the challenge). It's very tasty, but I think it can be improved, so I'm not going to give out the recipe until then... I also had plain yogurt (regular, NOT low fat) with some honey and sliced strawberries, and then a banana on the side. Very tasty, very satisfying...

Lunch is another granola bar, and a roast beast sandwich, along with grapes and an apple.

Supper... Well, I'm not entirely sure... We bought a bulk pack of chicken drumsticks, and I'd love to do teriyaki glazed and toss them on the bbq, but I'm going to have to look up recipes... Does soy sauce count as a whole food? What else would I use?!

I changed my WI day to fridays, to be kind to myself... I plan on doing lots of camping, during which time I will be a lot more lenient about my eating...

Speaking of, 14 sleeps to leaving for the Tombstones, and 44 sleeps 'til Amber gets here!! This will be a GREAT summer!


Mental Health, and a bit of "star-struck-ness"

Alright, I am learning more and more than exhaustion is BAD for my mental health. Not only does it hurt physically, but it fogs up my mental view, and everything becomes harder to read. I feel worse about myself, see others as worse than they are, and really just feel like hiding under my desk.

I could, you know! I mean, hide under my desk. It's huge! I could just move my shredding box, and I have a book with me anyway, and....

I digress.

Why is it so impossible to get enough sleep? I'm waiting for my referral to go through for the sleep lab so I can be tested for sleep apnea, but hopefully my weight loss will help with that. I know that cutting out a lot of the processed food should help how I feel physically too. But I can't seem to get enough sleep, and I have a hard time WANTING to go to sleep at night.

Does that affect all of us out there? Do we all feel like we have too much to do to deserve sleep? Do we all go to bed too late, get up too early, and then berate ourselves for sleeping in on the weekends?

On a side note (If you might be causing my star-struck-ness, please don't keep reading. It will only embarrass me!):

I'm a bit star-struck, honestly... I've had comments from Meghan Telpner (Making love in the kitchen, which is posted on "The Appetizer" on Nationalpost.ca), and Jen from Priorfatgirl comment on my blog recently! How crazy is that?!

Is this what comes from Blog-stalking people?

Ooh, maybe Alton Brown has a blog I can stalk, so he'll notice me! ^.~

Weekend re-cap, and Whole Foods Week!!

So, I really should have grocery shopped yesterday evening instead of napping, as this is the start of whole foods challenge week, but after this weekend, I was (and still am) exhausted!

The solstice festival weekend was good, but really rainy and cold... Friday night, it took me more than an hour to warm up to the point that my skin wasn't cold... And both friday and saturday, I was out there from 10am to midnight, so it was long days. Yesterday I left at about 5:30pm, along with the other craft vendors, and then I went and slept and slept and slept... Of course, we got a couple of phone calls... Stupid phone calls >.<

Today, I'm tired enough that I'm having a hard time focussing my eyes, and I'm feeling a bit feverish... The thought keeping me going?

2 days of work, then we get Canada Day off!!

As for the whole foods week challenge...

Thanks to my AMAZING husband (AMAZING AMAZING AMAZING) I am, infact, starting the whole foods week today, and not tomorrow... The wonderful man made bread last night, and then put a roast in the slow cooker so we'd have sandwich meat today. THEN he made an omelette this morning (Eggs and cheese - not the processed stuff). To supplement my omelette, I had a one slice sandwich with natural peanut butter (one ingredient - peanuts) and jam (small batch stuff from Kelowna - ingredients: plums, sugar, pectin)... Lunch is a roast beast sandwich, banana and apple. I'm going to be HUNGRY when I get home! But we're going to have roast beef, and probably potatoes and corn on the cob. And maybe brussel sprouts.

I think today, I'm going to look up recipes for homemade granola bars, or even just homemade granola... Also, I'm going to buy yogurt (plain, not low-fat) for breakfasts, to have with fruit and honey or maple syrup...

Oh, also had Tim Horton's tea this morning. One milk, one sugar.

Must... have... caffeine...


Ahh, the best laid plans...

Well, I had more junk food than I'd planned, because I was running way behind.

Also, I was FREEZING!!

Did decently... Not fabulous, but I had a great time... The music ROCKED!!

A pic:

or two:


Hope it doesn't rain!

Solstice Festival this weekend! (Yes, I know, solstice was LAST weekend, but the park was taken by the National Aboriginal Day festivities, so the festival is this weekend.)

I'm looking forward to sitting outside for 3 days straight, talking to lots of people, and....


Delicious vendor food!

But only for suppers, folks!

I'll update, and post pics.. I promise!


Yet another step towards a healthier lifestyle ~June 24th, 2009


It's amazing to think of all the steps that I've taken already to steer myself into an overall healthy lifestyle... Therapy, talking to my doctor about possible health issues, cutting out a lot of refined sugar, starting WW, starting doing exercising, cutting our cable tv... So far, I've been working towards health for about a year and a half, and I've really been trying to make one change at a time, and work it into my healthy habits.

And now, I'm going to work on incorporating a new one:

Whole foods.

I'm doing a bit of a challenge on the WW GDT board, a one week challenge to eat whole foods. Chris and I are really excited about it, but at the same time, we know that it will be really challenging and a really good exercise for our imaginations. It's amazing to think of all the foods that I take for granted, that I won't be eating any more of, at least for a week:

-No-sugar added chocolate pudding cups
-Miracle Whip
-Deli meat
-M&M Meats frozen chicken breasts
-Diet Pop
-Pita Bread
-Store-bought pasta

And, of course, the list goes on and on... Those are foods I eat really frequently, some on a daily basis! I'm astounded when I think of all the pre-packaged, pre-prepared, preserved foods I eat so frequently!

We're both hoping that this week works out well, because both Chris and I are really excited to make this next step in our lives. We'd love to (compassionately, and with wiggle room) transition into mostly whole-foods eating, baking bread and canning fruits and veggies, making our own mayo and jam, learning to make pasta, etc. We know that we don't want to be incredibly strict, because we know that we still need to live our lives, and we know that we'd like to still eat smores while we're camping, but it's something we've been playing around with for a while, and this challenge is really giving us the opportunity to dive in!

The other thing this means is no more "Fat-free", "Low-Cal", "Franken-sugar", "Suspicious number of ingredients" convenience and diet foods. This may mean that I'll need to adjust how I use my points, because I won't always have the low-points options that I had.

I'll need to use REAL substitutes for the Not-So-Real food I've been eating!

I'm hoping to document this first week really well, both in blog-form and in pictures, because I feel like this is the beginning of a big step in my phyical health.

So, what do you guys think I'm going to have the hardest time living without, hmm?


My Weightwatchers doesn't seem to be working, and it's very frustrating. The WW boards are rather becoming my lifeblood, my oxygen, and without them, I'm... erm... bloodless and suffocating?

Or rather, i'm just really bored.


The Creative Process

Hee hee hee... And an eating update! ~June 23rd, 2009

Ahhh, I love funny websites. Makes me happy, I tell you what!

Anywho, so I'm back on the tracking thing, and I'm bettering my eating, and I have to say, I feel better already! Last night for supper, I had a nice, big spinach salad, with apple and raspberries and strawberries, and it was SO good!! And then we had tomato soup, and grilled cheese sandwiches, on Chris's homemade multigrain bread... By the end of supper, I was full up, but in the good, healthy way. I didn't feel all heartburny, or greasy, or yuggy... I'd forgotten how nice it feels to be full of healthier food!

I know that this weekend will be a struggle, because I'm not home the whole time, and I'll be sitting, surrounded by food vendors. Fish & Chips, Indian Food, Burritos, Cotton Candy, etc etc etc... I know that last year, I ate most of my food from the vendors, and while it was delicious, it wasn't necessarily the healthiest option, so I think I've come up with a solution:

Breakfast and lunch from home, healthy snacks, and supper can be from a cart. That way, I'm not missing out on the yummy deliciousness that surrounds me, but I'm still balancing it out with homemade healthy food!

I don't know how I feel about everyone telling me how they can see how much weight I've lost, everyone gushing over how well I'm doing. I know it's odd, but I feel like that's an awful lot of pressure on me! I don't mean my online peebles, because all I feel from you guys is support, whether I gain or lose or stay the same. But all these people irl, the ones that I don't really know well (Tami, this doesn't include you), they gush over how well I'm doing, and I just feel like, if I don't keep it up, I'll be disappointing people!

And I'm doing this for me, not for my coworkers, or the people I see in my building, or whatever...


Back on Tracking ~June 22, 2009

Kookatsoon Lake - Not my picture...

I get the feeling that this is going to be a difficult summer for me, WW-wise... And this is the VERY first summer that I can say that.

Until this point in my life, summer was the bane of my existence. "It's too hot... There's nothing to do... I don't WANNA go outside!! Stupid bugs..."


I feel a bit like a new butterfly..

Wait, no. I'm sorry, that's a HORRIBLE simile! I will NOT compare myself to a brand new butterfly, because I just can't stomach that... It's TOO cliche, and TOO sappy. Ugh...

Anywho, I feel like...

Ooh, I feel like I'm seeing things in a totally different light this summer. The sun isn't so scalding, the earth isn't so dry... I know it has more to do with my recovery from depression, and my new-found better health, than it does with the sun or the earth or the bugs... But it feels like it's the surroundings that have changed, and not me.

I'm looking forward to DOING things this summer! I'm looking forward to getting some sun, and tenting, and picnicking, and walking... And the amazing thing is that this is the first of MANY summers of this!

The downside?

I find it a lot more difficult to be on-plan when I'm camping and picnicking... Especially camping! Even if I'm on-plan, I'm also going to be probably eating more sodium-rich foods. and camping for me involves a lot of relaxing, which usually means snacking. I try to pack mostly healthier foods and lower-cal options, but there's not only me that I have to think of. And, truth be told, I'm not exactly Ms. Healthy option... I'm a camping CHEATER!! *hides head in shame*

I'm thinking of moving my WI day to friday for the summer, so as to do damage control over the week, but would that be wise? Shouldn't I keep it on monday, so that I try to change my eating patterns for good?! This needs to be a lifestyle, not a, "work really hard for WI day and then relax for a couple of days."

I've been on WeightWatchers this time since January 12th, 2009. To be honest, I've had more not-OP and not tracking days than I'd like, even though that number is probably less than one week of my total time. As of today, I'm down 77.9 lbs, which is a number I'm very happy with. I've changed the way I eat, even if I'm not perfect all the time. I can walk for several kilometers, and I can even run in tiny, short stints.

And even better than that, I'm happy. I'm really happy! I love myself, and being myself!

Will I make this work over the summer? I'm confident I will.

Will this be a challenge?

You bet your, erm... Booty? :p

If anyone out there in blogland has some fun, easy, WW-friendly camping recipes (especially those that can be cooked in or on the fire), please send them my way!!



"The Flavour of Love"

Chantel: Hey! No stealing my ice cream!

Chris: Note to self - Chocolate is less important than ice cream.

Chantel: It's Haagen-Dazs, and it's the flavour of love... No kissing me while I'm eating the flavour of love!

Where did it go?!

Okay, I'm suffering from a SERIOUS lack of inspiration here... I need to REALLY get my butt in gear for next weekend, and I've got NOTHING! (I don't mean that I haven't made anything, because I have, but definitely not enough... )

Where did it GO?!

Maybe it's because it's summer, and my colour palette is much more winter than summer, or maybe I'm just...


This is getting bad! All I really want to do is play around with seed beads, but all that takes WAY too long, and I've only got a week left... My mind is just a blank, and I'm TOTALLY uninterested in everything I own!

I guess I should count how many pieces I've made so far... I get the feeling that this will be even MORE depressing...

Would anyone notice, you think, if 3/4 of the stock on my table was earrings? *sigh*


More Pic-a-tures

Check out more pics at http://www.flickr.com/GlaciersEdge

O.o -Well, then!

This is a very quiet day.

Eating-wise, I haven't been so great lately, but I'm okay with that. I know why I've been slipping, and I'm correcting that.

I fell asleep yesterday at about 7pm, and napped until 10pm, and then I got to sleep for the night at about 11:30pm... I had been SO exhausted this week, and hadn't really caught up on my sleep. I'm feeling MUCH better now, with the extra Z's!

Have any of you guys read, "The host"? Is it as good as Twilight?


*Flash* Ahh! I'm blind!!

Alright, these aren't ALL the pictures I'll post, but here's a sample! ^.^

I was supposed to be shrinking... ~June 18, 2009

Not disappearing!

Sorry I haven't been around lately... I've been feeling very antisocial, and very tired.

I really count on catching up on sleep on my weekends, and this weekend was NOT a good weekend for that. After being woken up at 6:15am on saturday morning (if you're packing up early, maybe no yelling and slamming?) and then not getting to sleep until 4:30am (story of this further down), and then being woken up at 9:30am by the call about Jack/Ozzie...

I still haven't caught up on my sleep, darnit!

So, yes, Jack is infact Ozzie.

So, saturday... It turns out, we were camped next to the party spot... So, at 1am, when we asked them to turn down their music, it seems they took offense to that, and got even rowdier, and were yelling at us. I get the feeling that they were a bit inebriated... It got to the point that, at 2am, we packed up our campsite and left, and when we got into cell service, we called the cops.

I was really scared, honestly...

In other news, I've now read all 4 Twilight books, AND Midnight Sun... In the past 5 days...

I haven't been tracking. I decided to take a break for the weekend, and I just haven't picked it back up... I'm not doing badly, and honestly I don't think I'm going over my daily points, but I just... I think that part of the reason is that I haven't felt like going to the message boards, and if I went to track, I'd feel obligated to go to the message boards... I'm going to start tracking again today, because I have to, and I'm going to try and track what I ate yesterday too. \

I don't know that I'm feeling depressed, because I don't FEEL depressed, but the anti-social-ness certainly is a symptom...

Honestly, I think I'm just really tired, though.

I'll try to remember to post some pics tonight...


The first gain ~June 15th, 2009

So, I took a weekend off from tracking, from being OP... I'm glad I made that decision, because, although I had a good time for most of the weekend, because of certain circumstances, I would have been too tired to be much good about counting anyway...

So I gained 6 pounds.

And I'm totally okay with that!

Firstly, I know I didn't eat an extra 21000 calories this weekend, so I know that this isn't all fat. I had a bunch of salty food, and not as much water as I should have, so I will be retaining water something fierce...

But also, emotionally, I needed a weekend off. I've been on this for about 5 1/5 months now, and I've been SO darn good! But I'm still human, and this still needs to become a lifestyle and not just a diet, so I need to be allowed to take a small break.

I don't feel the need to keep not tracking, and I'm really happy for that. I'm back on plan this morning, and I'm sure I'll have a good loss this week, now that I'm back drinking my wattah!

Pictures tonight, I promise!


Oh no!!!

Well, Jack (or, apparently, Ozzie) has gone off to live with Mike and Emily, and then this morning, I get a call...

The guy knows everything about the dog. Apparently, he wandered off while they were camping, and they looked all over and couldn't find him.... They thought he'd gotten eaten.

Apparently, the guy lives out of town, and only just saw a newspaper...

And now, I guess I might be breaking THEIR hearts...


Hi there world!!

Jack ~June 11, 2009

Well, it would appear that Jack has gone to his permanent address today. They came and picked him up while we were at work. The only thing I'm annoyed about is them not leaving a note, or calling to let us know, or anything...

I know he'll be happy there, and I'm happy for him.

I love pens. ~June 11th, 2009

That's right, you heard me! I love pens! I LOVE these triplus fineliner pens! I got this set of 10 recently, and I absolutely adore them, but now...

I'm dissatisfied...


A set of TWENTY?! And I only have TEN?! Oh NOES!!!
So, if anyone ever wants to send me the set of twenty *wink wink* I'd be totally open to that!


Challenge for you peeps! ~June 9th, 2009

(Shorter, as my longer post got eaten by the interwebs...)

I want to challenge ALL of you weight-loss folks to go and take some time to work on your mental health. I don't care if you think you're depressed or binge eating or not.

I think this is ESPECIALLY important if you've tried and failed before. I think this is ESPECIALLY important if you can't figure out why your brain seems to be sabotaging your weight loss.

I think this is ESPECIALLY, CRUCIALLY important if you don't love yourself the way you are, at the weight you're at, with the body you have, RIGHT THIS SECOND.

I'm BEGGING all of you! If you don't have the money, or the health insurance coverage, look at getting an appointment with your local branch of Mental Health. Talk to your family doctor and ask for some solutions! Find a workshop that deals with learning coping skills and managing depression. Take some meditation classes.



Blog Narcissism...

Alright, please tell me that I'm not the ONLY one out there that goes back and looks at their blogs repeatedly through the day. I'm not checking for replies... I'm just going and looking at my blog!!

I'm a blog narcissist!!

Weigh-In and Green Monster ~June 8th, 2009

So, I figured that this week, I'd have a gain, because of last week's gigantic loss...

I lost 2.3 lbs! What?!

I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, you know?

On another note, I had my first "Green Monster" today... It's definitely GREEN! I had banana and peanut butter, and I ended up having to add a little bit of honey because it wasn't very sweet... The aftertaste to me is definitely spinach, and next time I should pre-grind the flax seed, because it's still a little chewy.

I don't know that this is going to be a regular occurance for me, but we'll see... I would rather have my spinach as a salad, my banana whole, and my peanut butter on a pita with nutella. The downside to the green monster is that, at only 6 points, it's actually shortchanging my breakfast points. I have a bunch of strawberries on the side, but my normal breakfast is 10-12 points, because I'm supposed to eat 44 points a day.

The thought of DRINKING spinach still sounds kinda... Yuggy.


Yay!! We got the new cord (thanks Ebay!) for the laptop, and so now we can USE it again!!! It'd been so long, there was a layer of dust on the old girl!!

So, expect pictures soon, darnit!


Who wouldn't want a weekend like this?! ~June 6th, 2009

Another beautiful day up here in Whitehorse... We're getting so spoiled! It's not so great for the forest fires (well, good for the fires, bad for the people), which is a fact that I can REALLY appreciate. But for us whose homes aren't being threatened by fire, the sun has been wonderful!

Early-ish start this morning, for a Saturday. Got myself a summer hair cut; I have a lot of hair (thin, but loads of it) and it's been driving me crazy! Even back in a ponytail, it was really hot on my neck. Now my hair is off my neck... It's slightly longer in the front, and a bit shorter in the back, which is WONDERFUL! I have pictures, but they're stuck on my camera until the cord for the laptop comes.

Then we went for lunch at Erica's, which is a diner-type restaurant, in the Whitehorse Airport. The view from there is amazing!! The airport actually sits on a plateau above the city, but you can't see the city from the airport, or visa versa. So from the airport, you're looking out to the mountains in the distance, and Erica's has HUGE windows all along the side. We even managed to get a windowside table today!

I ordered a chicken burger, which was tasty, if not a little... generic. It was supposed to be a Maui chicken burger, and I ordered it without mayo... The only difference between it and a regular grilled chicken-breast type burger was a pineapple ring. I got it with a salad (no cheese... Why would you put cheese on a side salad!?), so I felt all healthy and virtuous, lol! (2T french dressing, regular.)

After grabbing some stuff at the fruit and veggie stand, we headed home... We had a coworker of mine and her bf over for lupper, and it was a really good time... We'd had them over once before, and it was a really good time, but it's been a year in between...

We had M&M meats Maple Salmon skewers, which are so freaking good!! I mean, I already knew that, but I haven't had them in a while. We served that with wild rice, and spinach salad with raspberries, strawberries and apple. I'm DEFINITELY doing spinach salad with fruit again... I've done salad with apple and raisin before, but never with this much fruit, and I really enjoyed it. I got compliments on it too (that's funny, just toss it all together, right? :p), so I think it'll be another 'companies coming' recipe.

For dessert: WW Lemon Bars Renovation... They're thinner, and a little more tart than a regular lemon square, but they're SO good!! It's all real ingrediants: Butter, sugar, eggs, etc... But it's a really thin, shortbread-ish crust, and then a thinner layer of lemon filling. It REALLY satisfies both your sweet and tart teeth...

It's so rare that I do much socializing that I had forgotten that it was really a lot of fun! Of course, the house-cleaning before hand isn't so fantastic, but I always have such a good time, and then I have a clean house afterwards!!

Once I'm done blogging, we're going to drive out to Marsh lake... I can't drive OUT, because I had a cooler with supper, but I should be able to drive back in.

Lets see... 370 lbs, 1 drink... I drank the drink for about an hour, with food. By the time we drive back, it'll be about 5 hours later...

I should be at 0 BAC by then! :D

I hope everyone out there in Blog land is having as fantastic a weekend as I am!!!


Today... ~June 5th, 2009

Today, I ate half a packing peanut. I'm (pretty) sure it was the biodegradable, cornstarch kind...

(Yay for getting packages! Half the worth of the package was about the size of a shoebox... The other half fit into a ziploc snack-sized bag...)


Green Monster Sidenote...

All of you Green Monster consumers... Maybe post your recipes? Or links to your recipes? I mentionned the Green Monster to a coworker, and now we're having a challenge - We're going to try it for a day, and if it's not the worst thing in the world, we'll give it a week...

101 posts!!! ~June 4th, 2009

I can't believe it!! This is my 101st post!!! I don't think I've ever made it past... 10? Lol!

So, I went to see my AMAZING psychologist this morning. I was really lucky - she had a cancellation, and I was able to get in to see her really soon.

Yeah, I'm doing SO much better!! I was holding all this resentment, and anger, and heartbreak, and she helped me realize that almost NONE of what I was feeling had anything to do with Chris or Jack. This was just a trigger that brought old wounds fresh to the forefront, my feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness and not feeling loved.

The great thing about that?


*Happy dance*

I have been neglecting to take the time, lately, to bolster my self-esteem. I haven't been making sure that I have what I need to be healthy, emotionally.

I got cocky!

Alberta (my therapist) told me that it's actually really common for this to happen to people who've worked through a lot of depression, and are seeing the other side. I'm not an emotional superwoman, but the fact that I was able to recognize the truth of the matter when she brought it forward REALLY shows how far I've come!

I know that I'll still have some sadness about giving up Jack. That is totally natural. But the anguish I was feeling, after only having him a couple of weeks, was totally irrational!

The car won't run smoothly if you don't give it tune-ups. It won't run without gas. It won't run without oil...

Thanks so much to EVERYone who has been so amazing to me lately!! I have really appreciated the wonderful support you've provided to me, and I'm so grateful for all of you!

Prayer ~June 4th, 2009

Dear God,

Please help me wash my soul's windows... They're so dirty, and I'm having a hard time seeing the light of Your love through them.

Please help me to open myself to be closer to You... I feel so close in the good times, but when I need You the most, I pull away. Help me to work beyond my human frailties and towards the peace that passes understanding...

Thank You for the blessings that You've given me... I have so many amazing people and wonderful things in my life...

In Your Name,



Peaceful Day ~June 3rd, 2009

I took today off of work... I know that, after last night, I needed a day to recuperate... It's preemptive mental health care, really. It's either 1 day now, or a week later...

Chris stayed home too, which was really lovely... I spent most of the morning sleeping on him while he read. I can't believe how much I SLEPT today! I was completely exhausted, and it was really wearing me down.

We went out and got lunch (fish and chips, from this vendor cart called The Flying Pisces, which is only open at lunch time on weekdays...), and sat in this really pretty park... In downtown Whitehorse, quite a few of the roads end with little grassy areas under the clay cliffs, and some of them have become parks. We sat on the grass, in the shade of a nice tree, and it was really restful. The fish and chips were totally delicious, and the temperature was perfect in the shade!

I've been doing some beading today too... I'm doing the Solstice festival (which isn't Solstice weekend... Odd, ne?) in a few weeks, so I need to get some pieces together. It's a music festival, so I'll be making smaller, less expensive, funkier pieces for this one. Last year, the first day of Solstice festival was super bright and sunny, and my left arm got really sunburnt; the rest of the weekend was rainy and stormy!! I stuck around through pretty much all of it, but I was completely unprepared for not-great weather...

Today, I'm trying to get my bead desk organized... I do it about twice a year, usually before I start working on pieces for crafting seasons. I am NOT an organized person; I am an ARTISTE!! (hee hee) I got more containers while I was in Vancouver - these great, clear containers that are all screw-top, so that if they spill, it usually works out pretty well. Also, you can see the contents... I used to use watchmaker containers, from Lee Valley Tools, which are great, but I can't tell what's IN them without opening the cases!

Spending a lot of time listening to Kings of Leon, whom I totally recommend. (Thanks, Amber, for the recommendation! You so know what you're talking about!!) If you go to Kingsofleon.com, they have their videos on there...

It's funny: I used to listen to really depressing music... Now, I would MUCH rather listen to something with a great beat - something I can DANCE to!

A little NSV today... I put on some jeans that I've had forEVER! They've gone with me through several sizes, up and down. You can see that, for a while, they were really stretched on me when I wore them. The denim is a bit distorted, and the fabric looks like it's been stretched repeatedly. Today, I put them on, did them up, and realized, "The front of the jeans aren't actually TOUCHING me!" These jeans that I used to wear, snug and right at the waist, are now baggy hipsters!

Did some more driving today too... I even PUMPED GAS!! And my driving instructor was right when she said that, when I got my confidence up, she'd be needing to tell me to slow down! Suddenly, I just want to put the pedal to the metal!! I'm feeling like I'm doing really well; My turning isn't as smooth as it should be, and I wouldn't ask me to park between two cars, but I can DRIVE, people!!

All in all, I'm feeling SO much better today... I know that there will be tough times in the next 1 1/2 weeks, before Jack leaves us, but I know that I need to be REALLY compassionate with myself through this.

I'll be okay. My marriage will be okay.



This Jack thing is pulling me at the seams... And my marriage is feeling stretched a bit thin right now too...

I have a crying headache... It's a good thing that Emily will never read this.

You TOLD me so!

And you can feel free to say it:

I'm starting to LOVE driving! It's still a little nerve-wracking, because I'm still getting a feel for steering, and speed control, and being around a lot of other vehicles... But I'm really loving it!

I'm SO excited to do more driving!!

My goal is to get my 'N' by the time that Amber comes up here in August, so I can drive us around!

I'm even going the speed limit, generally! Suddenly, 50 doesn't feel like 'crazy fast'! :p

Another *sigh* ~June 2nd, 2009

Yeah, yeah, I know... Typical EMO blogger! :p

But I'm so lonely, folks...

I'm having a really low self-esteem moment, and I just keep thinking...

If I were thinner, would more people want to be my friend?


Summer Fruit Crumble ~June 1st, 2009

-2 small peaches
-2 small plums
-2 nectarines
-1/2 cup of raspberries
-good sprinkles of cinnamon, nutmeg & cloves
-about 1 tsp of real vanilla
-1/4 cup unsalted butter, cold.
-1/4 cup all-purpose flour
-1/3 cup packed brown sugar
-1/2 cup rolled oats

-Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

-Slice peaches, plums and nectarines into wedges, and put them into an 8x8 baking dish, or a medium casserole dish. Add raspberries.

-Add cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves and vanilla to the fruit. Take 1 Tbsp of the flour, and 1 Tbsp of the brown sugar, and add to the fruit. Mix together gentle, so as to not smoosh everything too far...

-In a medium bowl, combine oats, and remaining flour and brown sugar. Add in butter, and cut into the mixture with a pastry cutter until the butter is in pieces the size of peas.

-Spread the crumble mixture evenly over the fruit.

-Bake for about 45 minutes, or until the crumb topping is evenly browned.

Serves 6 for 4 pts each, or 4 for 7 pts each. Perfect with Chapman's Plus Vanilla Frozen Yogurt!


Summer is a pretty precious time up here... The days may be long, but the months are short. You really have to make the most of it, and part of that is making summery meals (and, of course, desserts!) that really get you in the 'summer' frame of mind!

I love making this recipe... Cutting into the fruits, and having your hands get sticky with the sweet juiciness... Smelling the ripe nectarines and peaches - that wonderful, sweet smell that makes you think of fat bumblebees and wanting to find the best bit of shade... Working the butter into the crumb mixture, first with the pastry cutter, and then by hand, making sure that you'll get a wonderful, crispy texture...

The reason that you mix some of the flour and sugar in with the fruit at the beginning is that, while baking, these stone fruits will let out a lot of juices as they seemingly melt down, and, if you're unprepared, that can make for a soggy crumble! By adding the flour and sugar, you end up with a really wonderful, fruity sauce instead of messy juices. Personally, I reserve some of this, and spoon it over the frozen yogurt.

The crumb mixture is my basic crumb mixture - Honestly, you can make it, and spread it over pretty much any fruit combination, and it'll bake into a really nice crumble! Also, it's really great before baking, heh!

Best 100 Calorie Snacks

"This list was originally put together by Kippy2006. It is not intended to function as a real snack list (although for some of the entries, it certainly is reasonable)

It's a *thought starter*, an illustration to show how much more REAL food you can get for 100 calories compared to a nutritionless 100 calorie pack.

1/4 of an avocado
1.75 cups apple slices
1 medium banana
1 cup grapes
2 cups berries
1.5 cups sliced peaches
1.25 cups orange sections
1.25 cups blueberries
2 cups diced watermelon
1 cup sliced pears
1.33 cup diced pineapple
1.5 cups raspberries
1 cup cherries
2 large kiwifruit
3 clementines
4 cups cherry tomatoes or 10 plum tomatoes or 3 large beefsteak tomatoes
1 medium baked sweet potato
1 small baked white potato
2 cups carrot strips or slices
12 cups torn lettuce
10 large broccoli spears
8 cups sliced cucumbers
5.5 cups sliced bell or sweet peppers
5 cups whole raw mushrooms
32 spears cooked asparagus
2.5 cups cooked green beans
80 snow or sugar snap pea pods
4.5 cups mixed vegetable salad (without dressing)
1/2 cup cooked grain/rice/pasta (most, bulgur is 3/4s cup)
1 jumbo hard boiled egg
20 large boiled or steamed shrimp
2 oz chicken breast meat (a little more than 2 oz)
2 oz sirloin steak (a little less than 2 oz)
0.75 cup plain fatfree yogurt
3 cups airpopped popcorn

compared to:

less than an ounce of some kind of packaged cookie crispy thing"

I LOVE this list! One thing that I decided, this time around on WW, was I wasn't going to buy any of those 100 calorie packs, WW cakes or frozen meals, rice cakes, etc... I always found that when I ate those, I ended up hungrier than when I started out, and they were never SATISFYING!

If I want cake, or cookies, or whatever, I budget to have the real deal...

Now, I do have a COUPLE of exceptions to that rule:

-No-sugar-added pudding and jello: I have these with my lunch, and it gives me that little sweet kick, making me feel like I've had a treat without skyrocketing my blood sugar.

-Light cheese: Laughing Cow light spreadable cheese, and Mini-Babybel light cheese. I still have regular cheese, but I love these light alternatives as a day-to-day cheese sub.

-Frozen Yogurt: At the beginning of going back on WW, I was eating a fair amount of skinny cow bars, and fudgsicles... And then I discovered Chapman's Plus frozen yogurt... It's Frozen Yogurt with pre- and pro-biotic fibre!! Which means that it's not only lower calories and fat, but it's also loaded with fibre, and is totally delicious to boot. I'll allow myself ice cream no problem, but I'd really rather have this stuff! Especially the Poached Pear frozen yogurt, which is absolutely fantastic!! And, honestly, the vanilla is 1 pt for 1/2 a cup, and the pear is 2 pts for 1/2 a cup. Careful, though, because you've already maxed out the fibre at 1/2 a cup, so the points go up more steeply from there.

-Diet Pop: Not often, but once in a while. I prefer the President's Choice Lychee or Grapefruit diet pops. I vowed to myself that I wouldn't drink regular pop EVER again (unless Sara comes up here, in which case, we need to have Coke and Pringles) because I was drinking litres and litres of it, and my blood sugar and insulin were total messes...

Other than that, I eat real cookies and cake, real butter, real meat... And I love it all!!

Milestone WI! ~June 1, 2009

So, this week, I lost another 7.2 lbs!!!! I don't know how it happened, because I didn't exercise at all this week! I'm thinking it's probably residual calorie burninating from last week's 38 activity points!

That brings my total Weight Loss to 78.9 lbs!! I SMASHED the 75 pound milestone!!

Next up, my 2nd 10%, which takes me VERY close to my 100 lb mark!

Also, I was able to get my goal-outfit size 22 pants (remember, I started in 32's) up, over my legs, and up over my butt!! Now, of course, they're nowhere NEAR doing up, but when I started this, 28's were nowhere near doing up, and now I'm wearing them comfortably! I can do up 26's now, so not much longer until I can wear those!

When I got the size 22 pants, I couldn't pull them up past my knees... It's strange, I don't FEEL like I've shrunk, but I can totally see the difference in the way that clothes fit.

I should have done measurements ~.~'

I guess it's never too late to start, though!